Happy Thanksgiving

This morning I got up with kids and tried to start packing. We have one week to move into the new house, and the new house isn't even finished. We will have to live downstairs while we wait for the bathrooms upstairs and the carpet to be put in. My husband even suggested we live with his parents for a few weeks, which makes me cringe. Not that it probably isn't a good idea, but I don't know that I can do it. I put up with enough criticism from his mom, I can't imagine being with her 24 hours a day. And, I took the next two weeks off so I could pack and move, and that would mean I would be stuck in her house with my kids (with an ungated, uncovered, unalarmed black bottom pool in the backyard).

And by the way, Tess is crawling, yea! She is moving and grooving, and trying to stand up already, which makes me nervous because I really don't want her to walk too soon. Owen took so long that we got very comfortable with him being mobile by the time he was walking. With Tess, I feel like she is trying to do new things every day and of course, she's not nearly as cautious as Owen, so she falls more.

Not to mention that having a crawling baby among packed boxes of stuff is not the best thing. I really do hate moving. We lived for so many years in my parents house, and then when I moved out here I spent at least 2-5 years in each place. Since Erik and I have been together, we have moved four times, not including a move out of the this house for three months and then back.

I was so sad the other night about leaving this house. I broke down and cried. I just love this house and the memories we have made here. It was the house Erik and I moved into right after we got married, and then we had Owen here and Tess. I know the other house will be great, and we will just have to make new memories, but we will be so out of sorts for a while until the construction is done that I am just not looking forward to it.

I suppose in a few months everything will be okay. By that time, we will have adjusted, and at least we didn't have to move into a temporary apartment. We will be able to walk to the park and the library. So what if I have to be gone with the kids for most of the day? I suppose life could be worse.

Happy Turkey Day to all...

Some Recent Photos

I feel like I never post pictures, so I thought I would do that today...Tess is now 9 months old, and finally crawling! She's so cute when she gets going. Owen is 3-1/2, and talking up a storm ever since he had the tubes put in.

Why So Stubborn?

I don't get it. When God was making our children, what was He thinking when He decided that they should have the stubborn trait? What was that all about?

Today, I picked Owen up from school, and the teachers went on, again, about how stubborn he is. And it's not just my child, every child with Down syndrome seems to have this stubborn streak. It's as if that extra chromosome gave them some extra stubborn juice, or something. I know exactly what his teachers meant, too. Even though he is very capable of doing something, he won't. He refuses, and he looks away, as is by avoiding looking you in the eye, he can get away with it. I hate it. I wish that God had thought a little harder about our kids when he did that. I mean, really, they will have a tough enough time as it is in school, so they have to be stubborn on top of it??

Then I thought about it for a while. And I thought, you know, our kids are just more real than other kids, more honest. They won't follow the rules and do what they are supposed to do because they don't work from a place where they realize they must abide by society's rules. So they refuse to cooperate if they don't want to do it. Is that so wrong? Why am I trying to fit my child into the universally excepted idea of what a child at 3 should be doing? But I suppose at the end of the day, I do want my child to fit in and to succeed. I want him to be able to be liked by other kids, and by the people in his life. I mean, we love him to death because he is our child, but when he is being stubborn and refusing to abide by certain rules that our society dictates, how will other people view him?

I suppose I should be more like my husband and not care what people think, but I know that it does matter. Maybe Owen and Tess will be lucky enough to have inherited Erik's amazing sense of self-esteem, and it won't matter to them, either.

My Little Conversationalist

I haven’t written in so long; the days just sail by. It’s so hard to find time to write when I just enjoy sitting with my kids, reading, laughing, playing ball, or even just watching TV. I know that Owen watches a lot of TV, but I can’t help it. There are times when I just need to put him in front of it to have some time to myself. Like now. We spent two hours in the park, then when I came home it was diapers, and potty, and lunches and milk and laundry. Finally, Tess has gone down for a short nap, and Owen is watching Nemo.

It’s amazing to me how much his language skills are picking up. He now says “Memo” for Nemo, when before, he would never say it. He is starting to say, “Owen,” sometimes, and I love when he says, “Mommy,” although he says “Bobby,” instead of Mommy. But I am so thrilled that I always answer, “Yes, Owen.” In fact, the other day, I had a revelation. I had picked up Owen from school, and as I always do, I ask him how school was. He never gives me a straight answer, but he will say, “Bobby,” and I say, “Yes, Owen,” and he says, “Flowers…sun…trees…” And I say, “that’s right Owen. The sun makes the trees and flowers grow.” A minute later, “Bobby.” “Yes, Owen,” I answer. “The fishes are swimming in the water,” he says. And I smile and say, “that’s right, Owen, the fish swim in the water.” And our conversation goes on. And I really feel as if I am conversing with my son. Not everyone would understand that we are having a conversation, but we are. And I am so proud of him, that he is communicating with me, that it makes me feel as if I too, get a chance to experience what motherhood with a typical child is like. We had our MOMs support group the other night, and I told them how amazed I was that he is able to communicate, and not just through sign and gesture anymore.

I also realize lately that we as parents of children with Down syndrome are getting robbed. Robbed of our ability to be able to enjoy our children, and expect more of them. I can’t tell you how many times we have all commiserated with each other because we thought our children would not be able to do anything, or if they did, it would take them forever to do it. Yet, my son walked at 21 months, potty trained the same month, and has had numerous milestones much sooner than the medical community led me to believe. The medical community seems to enjoy painting the dark, horrid picture of how miserable our kids’ lives will be. But what they don’t point out is that, given the time and the patience and the love, they can succeed in a timely manner. Why do they do that? Why are they so insistent on making us feel bad for having our children? What is so wrong with having a child who is all about love?

Tess is really moving around now. She’s not crawling yet, per se, but she is trying. She goes up on her knees, then lowers her back, and combat crawls. She’s doing exactly what Owen did, and pretty much in the same timeline. Owen combat crawled at 10 months, then really crawled at 13 months, and Tess is 9 months. I do hope that she crawls, and doesn’t just skip right to walking. It’s funny, though, to me she seems to be reaching milestones the same as Owen. She has to go through the same learning pattern as he did. In my mind, I guess I always thought that when I had a typical child, they would just up and crawl, like magic; no steps in between, no learning curve, just a leap forward. I have to say, though, I am so lucky to be able to be home and enjoy watching my children grow. So many parents don’t get that chance, and they miss out on it. I see how fast Tess and Owen have grown, and I know in a matter of years, I will be wishing they were babies again. So, for now, I’m going to fill myself up with every moment I can.