Fingers Crossed

I'm nine weeks today...I can't believe it! In some way, I still don't believe this is real, so I haven't been walking around feeling as if I'm about to burst with a secret. I just continue doing my normal stuff each day, checking to make sure I'm still pregnant. We haven't told any family yet; I think I'm putting them off the longest. A few friends know and that's it. I don't want to make the mistake of telling people and then having to retrace my steps and tell them things didn't work out. Out of the blue, a couple of months ago, one of Owen's old babysitters called me and wanted to check in to see how everything was going with the new baby. I had forgotten that we never got a chance to see her and tell her things didn't work out. It was weird. I mean, I would have had a three-month old right now, as well as Owen. Not sure that would have been a good thing for Owen. Maybe God does know what He's doing.

If things do work out and I get to that stage of being very pregnant, I think I'm going to paint a T-shirt with the words "I'm not taking the test, so don't even ask." Of course, I'll have to put an asterick so that in tiny, tiny words I can say that if we find something incredibly wrong, of course we will do an amnio. But let's face it: my son has Down Syndrome, and they never found anything! In fact, nobody even suspected for two whole weeks! And then they only verified it through a blood test. I'm sure by the time he was a year old and not walking we would have questioned things, but there was really nothing physical that indicated anything wrong in the beginning. I just hate the way people always want to know if you're going to take the test. Look, I already have a child with Down Syndrome, it's a known factor for me. Why take a test on the second child? To rule it out? Wouldn't that be like saying "oops, we made a mistake the first time by not taking the test, we better take it this time." A funny thing I heard recently from a friend of mine who started working at the hospital where we had Owen. She started working there about three months after we had Owen, and apparently, we were known as The Undiagnosed Down Syndrome Case. I guess, in some ways, we're famous.