Tuesday, November 22, 2005


Okay, so I really like my friends, and I'm really happy that we are all pregnant again, but I just hate getting in conversations with people who think they know it all, based on the one-sided opinions of their doctors.

They have tried to convince me that an amnio is the only way to be sure your child will be fine (oh really? Since when does an amnio detect for stillbirth? Or autism? Or cerebral palsey? or the myriad other things that can go wrong...just say it, to test for DOWN SYNDROME).

And now, as we get closer to our due dates, when I tell these same people that I am going to do a VBAC, I get a pause, and then they tell me that I really should make sure I know what I'm doing because in the end it's all about having a healthy baby. Yes, I understand that, but I have done enough research and met with enough doctors and midwives to know that this is what is right for me and my child at this time. If I need a C-section, fine, I'll have another one, I don't need to be a hero. But, I also think it's only fair to give this child the best opportunity for a vaginal birth, since in the end, that is what is better for the baby. It's funny, because I can just hear the words coming from their doctor, who has had lots of practice at gently swaying them into a repeat C-section. My regular OB-GYN, who delivered my son by C-section, was very supportive at my decision to change doctors and hospitals in order to have a VBAC. He told me that in Europe (where he studied) there would be no question that I would attempt a VBAC, but here in the states, the rules are different. I am happy with my decision, but I hate when others try to foist their opinions on me, because it undermines the mental attitude I need to have in order to prepare myself for the birth of my daughter.

I really wish people would just mind their own business.


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